Monday, February 18, 2008

Mom Jeans And Muffin Tops

Do you remember hearing a statistic that alleged that 40% of American women are size 14 and larger? I certainly remember hearing that statistic and it came as no surprise to me. A mere look around on city streets can give you that information.

Most women do not have bodies like the fashion models on the runways, they have "real woman" bodies, they have bodies like the women in the Dove commercials I believe. I am one of those women, the 40%. I have been voluptuous, curvy, chunky, plump, big-boned, plus-sized, whatever euphemism you want. I have always had T&A and a pear shaped figure that masquerades as hourglass.

I have been a proud wearer of "mom jeans" for years, only I didn't know it. I first heard this unflattering connotation only 3-4 months ago while listening to the radio. The "on air personalities" were describing "mom jeans", the high waist is what really hit a nerve. It seems that lower waisted jeans are now the trend, because the higher waisted jeans flatten out your butt. Let me tell you, ain't nothing flattening this butt! Has no one noticed that when you are fuller figured (forgot to add that label to the list) if your jeans are low you risk that other fashion faux pas: the muffin top? Let's not forget to mention, you have to wear exceptionally long tops to avoid looking as if your next job will be that of a plumber.

Listen up Stacy London, or those two British magpies that Oprah enjoys having on her show, you can't have it both ways; though I don't think I'd take fashion advice from people who'd grab parts of my body like they're checking a rump roast at the grocery. Low jeans = butt cleavage and or flesh hanging over the tops of the jeans. Oh one more thing fashion mavens, this style of jean was popular for everyone in the 80's and 90's. We've all seen how fashion recycles so don't blame me when you're going to a thrift store to find this style when it's resurrected.

I used to listen to every hoo-hoo who allegedly knew what I should wear without even seeing me, but I'm not that girl anymore!